Poem- Man woman and Shadow

This is an old poem written in my early twenties.One of my favourites.Posting it here .

The relationship of a man and a woman
Was like a person and his shadow....

In the morning they rose tall and high,
The beginning of love, no signs of a sigh.
The journey was long, distance unmeasured,
Differences arose, the paths were to change,
The heat was terrible, more terrible their minds,
It was mid/(day/way), they were definitely tired...
The heat gave in, I smelt a compromise,
Fresh breath of air, an unmentioned silent sacrifice.
The sunset again and what do I see?
Midday differences had melted away,
And they grew taller and higher merging into one
With dreams of starting all over again................

Stay at Home Mom Saga

It has probably been seven years since I wrote..Oh wait! Did I not have enough time?Well I did.I was a stay at home mom (SAHM). But raising two boys (probably growing like weeds??) is a Herculean task I have set upon myself.
I did sneak in a diploma in learning disabilities in between these years.I got back to work part time in a school and have probably completely kissed my IT career good bye.(sob sob!!)
My husband says Iam away from the corporate tamasha and those haunting telecons, but I do miss socialising and this SAHM does not offer much.
It is an unpaid job.I have no holidays or leaves(I do have the falling sick days, but you are so busy cleaning somebody's nose, your achoo----is quite completely unheard by the boy gang at home!).
There is no recession, progression or elimination from your duties.Kitchen works all time ,all season.

Had someone told me that this would be the state of affairs 16 years ago as I embarked on my campus job, I would probably have looked them in the face and boxed their ears so hard that even an hearing aid would not have been of much use.

But today, as I sit down and write,Iam more at peace with myself.The decision to opt for the unpaid post was mine.I do enjoy my time with the boys.I did enjoy my part time work days and may end up going back to work part time again.

The other day as I spoke to my engineering classmate and told him that I may go back to school to study something, all he said was, Appreciate your earnest to study at this age!
And hear is my answer.

Dawn of realization that 40 is knocking on your door(wasn't I 20 something yesterday??)
Plus handling two active boys aged 9 and 4 will never allow you to be in a state of inertia.
Iam the proud chauffeur mom and going to school would be that prized "Me time" which I could earn.
Also, school meant assignments and a very effective way of leaving my boys under daddy's wing to get a breather :-).Not bad at all.

Here is a piece of advise(why am I giving it?because I always get it!!)
To all the stay at home moms,
It is your individual choice to take upon this role.Do not let the world talk you down upon your choice.Nobody would run this circus even if they are offered a million dollars.
Do take your time off from this a few times because this job can get irritating.

Amen!

Career breaks(Brakes??)

This is probably my 6th career break in the past 10 years of worklife.
The reasons for these breaks have been family.Mother passed away, got kicked off during 9/11, went to the US with husband, found a job there, maternity break, family leave break and now the return to india break(BRAKE!!)

After every break, there would be that enth to get back to work, wonder why I really killed my career etc etc.

Currently Iam preparing for all the pre KG admission interviews(I never was so unsure in my life before.All decisions were done mostly easily.)Never thought a lot when we bought a house or delivered a child.But deciding on a school to send my 2 year old toddler is like a billion dollar question.ICSE, CBSE, State board, donation , term fees, transport.......woof!

Life at this point of time is standing on a big bridge of uncertainity.
What do i do next?Get back to IT?Remain a stay at home mom?Get my ass up and get back to practice so that I can get back to dance?Dont know...Dont know.................

The only dawn of realization is this.Every other problem I had in the past were all a easy to decide situation, turn the wheel around to go around types.
After Amogh has come in, Iam held responsible for all his physical/social/moral development. which is a continuous process.

One of my colleagues in the US had commented, Children?We go into our graves worrying about them !

I hope I recover from this break like I have from my past ones...And for all those lonely souls who have seen it all and done it all by yourself, there is always light at the end of the tunnel

Parenting truths

Amogh turned 16 months last week and as any parent says time flies fast, I must admit it does.

He is yet to walk and talk, but I have come to accept the truth that every child takes his time.
As a person Iam very impatient and pushy and want things to be done the right way.
My son was on the other side.Calm, slow and took (still taking) his own sweet time to do things.It was very difficult to accept this truth.As my apartment was surrounded with kids of his age and most of them a few months younger but more advanced in their physical and vocabulary skills, I sometimes wondered whether I was failing as a parent.

Both of us had fulltime IT jobs where work never seemed to end.Hooked up to a laptop most of the times, I sometimes wondered if we ever did justice to him.

It took me some guts to resign at a time where everyone was holding on to their existing jobs in the economic crisis.I wanted to slow down in my life and enjoy my son's childhood.
I know that our luxuries will come down, but Amogh wont be a baby forever.
A child needs unconditional love and time and as a responsible parent I need to give him that.

Shopper (STOP) in US

There has always been something about shopping in the US.The malls, the leisure and the lesser crowd.But sometimes, it can be a vicious never ending adventure.



Those coupons!The Ads!and the lovely credit cards.................

Are we not on our way pumping gas on the highway to find recluse in a mall?

Oh the baby loves it.Its summer, we need spring clothes and so on and so forth.



I also know of a lot ot of people whose only excuse is that they visit India once a year and cannot wait that long or cannot think of bringing in much....And so they shop till they can drop and also wind up with extra luggage from India(those over brimmed suitcases with Lifestyle clothes, mom's pickles and entire bangalorean garbage:-)

There has always been this truth.Coming to the US to make money......End up shopping and spending more money.More credit cards ...........................

That was when I came to this idea of STOP SHOP instead of the SHOPPER's STOP.

I never buy anything unless,
a>Clothes are too old, faded torn
b>Out of style, does not fit(which is the case always with me !!!:-()
c>The ones I have not worn in a long time is dropped off in a box.
d>I dont buy many of the same type(5000 tops for a freaking weakened faded jeans!!!!)

The simple idea is to make space for new clothes, get rid of the old ones in a decent way and not stock junk......

The money saved in useless shopping is donated or invested in books for self or Amogh(my son)

It took me a while to get into this, but so far has been good.

So, for all those who complain that they have a "LOT" when they go back to India and can't ged rid of their stuff, this article should help...........

So STOP.......The goal is reached.end the useless shopping mania

On buying a house in the US/Apartments in Bangalore

This is my second year in the US and looking at the way real estate is doing tempted me to buy a house here.However I decided to closely examine the life of a few of our family friends and see how they did with their little mansions.

Ensuring I don't use names to guard privacy(else brickbats are awaited) let me narrate the saga of a few families visited.

One of our friends attributed his weight loss success story to the new house.Sounds peculiar, but the lawn mowing, snow clearing, landscaping(see -its not a big deal-plant a few trees) repainting did it all.Think of all the money saved by not enrolling in a gym.

The second friend got good at accounting and planning.Here it goes
2008 self bonus-Leather sofa set from lazy boys
2008 wife bonus- LCD TV to be stuck on a wall
2009 self bonus -Landscaping
2009 wife bonus- California windows and office space furnishings at home
2010 self bonus.................................................................:-)

The third one planned a number of tours to thy neighbours homes.Picked up quite some tips from each one.I happened to be a dazzled spectator of one such tour wherein the neighbour displayed her home in style (felt like taking a Louvre tour)and explained the importance of the master bed.It turned out to be pretty high(wondered if there was a magic ladder or stool hidden to climb on it) and the quilt supposedly made from the feathers of an rare species Greek bird.
The cleaning process of the quilt involved numerous steps(for now lets get back to the topic) and I wondered how much money would have gone on such a thing where your chances of falling from the same outweighed the importance of it.
Nevertheless, our friend did buy a big bungalow and so it went on for a long time,Painting the house, redoing the windows , a minibar and kick-a-leg ballroom in the basement.I must definitely appreciate their time and dedication, but when it was all done, the house was put for sale and a paltry 25K profit out of the entire exercise!!!!

In this country where both the spouses work(for need or to kill boredom) and where children are programmed to be occupied 24/7 365 days in a year,
Does owning such a big den really make sense?
That money could have been spent on a family trip to the big Ben instead!
Are own houses a place for annual get togethers and grill????

On a similar note are the palatial apartments in Bangalore where IT couples spend very few hours in the house and the rest on the roads laden with traffic or their Air conditioned cubicle.
Children have their own room, CDs , TV , laptop and are hardly out of their den.

When I look at the other side of the road lined with tiny houses with a maximum of one big bedroom and an entire family living in it, Iam amused not because of the fact that they are the "not so blessed" economically hit strata of the society, but the peace of mind they possess.
Children from such homes still play on the road without servant supervision, share their toys (broken bats and used scooter tyres:-) and enjoy their time living thy moment.
On the other side are the children from the IT couple sector who are enclosed in the apartment complex accompanied by their respective maids or the children in these big houses surrounding the big apple with high-fi gadgets killing time and rusting their brains.

Say, isn't it time to get back to a good old tyre swing on the mango tree?
Yawa Mohana Murali kareyitho doora theerake ninanu
Yawa brindavanavu seliyithu ninna mannina kannanu................................................

The Universal brothers

It would be close to 9 years after graduating from Engineering.But as the saying goes, it still seems like yesterday.
I happened to chance upon my poetry book and lo behold I got to read the poem written by me on two very interesting personalities of our college time.For all the pranks they played, i must admit they turned out to be two successful personalities in life.They also formed an e group ensuring that all our batchmates kept in touch.And till date have remained to be the very best of my friends.

The great poem--:-)

THE UNIVERSAL BROTHERS

Criminal looks, diehard Image

Sporting biceps thinner than matchsticks

Oh!Here they come to display their antics

One is surely Maharishi Narad

The other no better than him

Can you guess what they are competing for

Forcing their entry amidst girls

The first competition is blading

Second is a pretty disastrous one

To obtain the title of "Krishna paramatma"

Little do they know

They are two precious ge(r) ms

Presenting Junnu bhai and Nag bhai

The universal brothers of the world